Date Night

Every Tuesday night I have a date with a needle. It’s time I touch on this topic, poop. 

The never ending battle of what I can and can’t eat, pain, exhaustion and which medication to try next. 

When I was twelve Years old I was diagnosed with Ulcerative Colitis. I didn’t understand what that meant for me long term at the time. What i did know and feel was embarrassment and wondering “why me?”
 I remember it being “in the way” when it came to my social life as a teenager. I remember it being embarrassing when with boyfriends. Keeping some of my first jobs was a total fail because they caused a new stress and with stress comes “flares”. For those of you who don’t know, a flare in my world is essentially uncontrollable bowel movements and pain in excess. 

This year I will hit TWENTY years of battling (and often being battled by) this disease. I have tried every drug available on the market for it. Some even not approved and still on study. 
I have been part of countless research groups and filled out a million surveys with hope of contributing to the effort to find a cure. 

I am pushing the limits and defying the odds of time with the disease and risk of developing cancer. 

It’s not all sad, even though most of my life has been lived with Ulcerative Colitis. I married an amazing, patient and understanding human and cooked and birthed three healthy children. I believe they are my purpose here. They push me everyday to function when often I don’t want to. They encourage me to smile, laugh and play. 
I am currently trying what I’ve been told is my last drug option. I inject it into my body every Tuesday night. My kids cringe and can’t believe mommy can just stick a needle in without crying. 
It has settled my symptoms some, but certainly has not achieved remission or given me symptom free results. I hope it does. After all, isn’t that all I can do?

So here is to Tuesday nights and my dates with a needle!

Kim

Author: childrenchickenscolitis

City girl turned country lady. I am a confident woman, dedicated wife and proud mother of three beautiful children. I am going on my twentieth year of living with Ulcerative Colitis. My love for chickens has often made family and friends question my mental state. I enjoy crocheting, baking and staying cozy by the fire all winter long.

9 thoughts on “Date Night”

  1. Hey! I had to google to find your blog because wordpress cock-blocked it. So glad I did! I have a date with Humira every Saturday. Luckily my husband injects it because I f*cked it up the first time (raw talent) and I don’t trust myself to do it. It makes me sad when my toddler pretends to inject herself, because I don’t ever want her to go through this. I hope Humira works for you for a long time (and for me too). My goal is to have another baby and then whatever happens, happens–if it’s surgery then so be it because I’m sick of this sh*t (pun intended). XOXO

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  2. I am so happy I found your blog! This definitely gave me a glimmer of hope that eventually it does get better and you do find some sense of “normalcy”, whatever that may be. Thank you for writing this post :)!

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    1. So glad you enjoyed. Your first few doses may leave you feeling icky. I also dose at night with hopes that I can just sleep off the initial grossness of the shot. 3 kids to take care of in the morning so I’ve got to be at least good enough to take care of them.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. How long do you normally feel icky for? I haven’t decided yet when I’m planning to take it. I don’t have kids so I get to be a little more selfish with my time, but I do work so I wonder if I should save it for the weekend?

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